User Manual – Guest Blog by Julie Davis, LMFT

0julieA friend called me the other day raving about the new gadget that she had saved for, shopped for, invested in, and finally owned. Two weeks later I asked her about it:

“It’s too complicated. I can’t figure out how to make it work.”

“What about the User Manual?” I suggested.

“I don’t have the time. I’m just going to get rid of it.”

Unfortunately, I find this to be a similar way of thinking in many relationships:

“Why does he do that?”

“What were they thinking!?”

“Doesn’t she know…?”

“How could he…?”

We get confused, angry, disappointed, and eventually get rid of relationships because we can’t figure out how to make them work.

This week, I invite you to complete the following User Manual and forward it to people close to you. Exchange, listen, share and discuss to grow rather than get rid of your relationships. 

MY USER MANUAL

  •  To get my attention it’s best to….
  •  If I seem distant it’s probably because…
  •  When I get grumpy it’s helpful to…
  •  The best time/place to talk to me seriously is…
  •  The worst time/place to talk to me seriously is…
  •  If you need me to do something it’s useful to…
  •  When I feel insecure I tend to…
  •  I feel happy when …
  •  I feel sad when …
  •  I feel loved when …
  •  I feel scared when …
  •  I feel encouraged and supported when …
  •  I feel angry when …
  •  I feel the best when…
  •  When I malfunction, the best thing to do is:
  •  When I’m tired please…
  •  When I’m stressed please…
  •  When I get home from work please…
  •  Fun things I like to do:
  •  I need help with…
  •  Someday I would love to…
  •  Favorite authors:
  •  Favorite music:
  •  Favorite topics:
  •  Other:

Julie Davis, LMFT
Licensed Marriage Family Therapist 
Certified Rapid Resolution Therapist 704-807-1101, appointments available in California, New York, & North Carolina. Website, Subscribe to weekly article

 

Autumn Hahn is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist practicing at Clear Mind Group in Weston, Florida. Call 954-612-9553 for a consultation. Follow Autumn on TwitterFacebook, and Google+. Sign up for the e-newsletter HERE.

Your Money Story – guest blog by Stephanie Steen

0ssMONEY!

It is one of those things in life that people both love and hate!

Unfortunately, money can negatively impact both your physical and mental health. Being in debt and missing payments can cause physical health problems such as ulcers and can affect depression and chronic stress. Even if you are not in debt, money can be a burden on your life and your relationship.

That is because you enter adulthood with a money story. Your money story can change and develop as you find your place in the world.

So what exactly is a money story?

Your money story is how you look at and react to different financial situations. It is based on how you grew up and the struggles or benefits you had.

To start writing your money story think about:

  • What was your family’s financial status growing up?
  • Did you get the things you needed or were there times you went without?
  • Did your family have an extreme increase or decrease (lost job or inheritance)?
  • What did your family teach you about money?
  • What is your current relationship with money?
  • What about money now makes you feel positive or negative?
  • What do you feel money can buy?
  • Write a paragraph about money and see what pops up.

Your money story affects your mental health when your life is not congruent to the thoughts you have about money.

Let’s say for example your money story includes growing up with a decent amount of money. You had everything that you needed plus most of what you wanted. Your parents prided themselves on being able to provide. You saw that your parents worked hard, but maybe you did not see them very often because of that.

As an adult raising a family you now struggle with making money and balancing that with having a family. You live paycheck to paycheck. You struggle with wanting to make more money and wanting to be home. Your struggles come from the incongruency in your life and your story.

Recognizing your money story can help you understand the stress you feel. It is a starting point to dive into what is most important and begin to accept or change where you are.

Stephanie Steen, Registered Mental Health Counseling Intern is a therapist in Melbourne FL. She works with women who are in the middle of a major life transition (divorce, loss of job) and helps them to see the light at the end of the tunnel so they can begin living authentically again. She shares tips on regaining happiness on her Facebook Page and website.  

Autumn Hahn is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist practicing at Clear Mind Group in Weston, Florida. Call 954-612-9553 for a consultation. Follow Autumn on TwitterFacebook, and Google+. Sign up for the e-newsletter HERE.