I dislike the expression “it’s all in your head” because it presumes that what you are experiencing is less than real. Pain is not “unreal” or “in your head,” but instead the relay system travels through your brain, like a train station, and changes can be made at that station.
Living without pain is possible Continue reading “Pain Blocking in 4 Hours”
In a therapists’ group I belong to, someone asked what to say to a teenager who had recently come out to their family, but the family was unable to accept the information. I can only speak for myself:
The world is a tough place. It would be nice if we all “got it” that everyone is just trying to get through their day and feel love and support, and wouldn’t it be nice if we all provided that love and support to one another? But it’s not so. For most people, you can turn a blind eye and walk away. but for some people, you have to learn to work within their system. For a teenager, living at home, this is certainly the case. Continue reading “Being Out in an Unaccepting Family”
“Resistance” is a word therapists are taught that means “the client is not being compliant”, or “the client is not doing what you requested of them.” I first came up against “resistance” in my early career in relation to homework. Using Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Continue reading “Resistance as a Myth”
In recovery from substance abuse, there are many options, though many people who have had success, or heard of others having success, with a particular route will encourage you to follow that path. The correct answer for you is personal and it may mean you have to try out several options. Continue reading “Goldilocks in Recovery”
Some people want you to succeed.
They see and experience all the wonderment of who you are and the gifts you have to share.
They are interested and invested (with time, money or energy) in who, what and how you contribute to the world: including your mistakes and failures.
They are supportive when you are called away to other people, places and situations that fuel your soul, inspire your mind and energize your body.
They don’t need you in order to feel accomplished and safe in their own lives. Yet they know intuitively that they need you to be accomplished and safe in your own life and will speak truth (with love) to help you get there.
This is your Wise Council. This week, I invite you to listen.
Two living rooms
Growing up in Los Angeles, I only saw homes with a common living room. When I moved to South Florida, I started seeing two living rooms, something which is apparently common. You have your formal living room, a space for adults to entertain colleagues, acquaintance, and those they want to impress. A little further in is your family room, what I had known as a living room, where the TV, video games, and books are kept, where the family and close friends gather to converse and spend time together.
There are boundaries you can set in your life, such as who has certain information about you. Continue reading “Your formal living room”
I just saw Pacific Rim: Uprising (no spoilers). In the Pacific Rim movies, the stars pilot a mech, called a Jaeger, and fight Kaiju, monsters that have risen from the ocean, to protect the city. A Jaeger takes two pilots who have to “drift” in order to work well together. The process shares intimate memories with the copilot. Once a pair of pilots drifts, they can train together to maintain control of the mech and be in sync.
As a hypnotherapist, new clients sometimes say that they are nervous about “being hypnotized” because they are afraid of feeling “out of control.” Statements like this are based on misinformation about hypnosis and hypnotherapy, as seen in TV. Continue reading “Power in surrender”
There has been a shift in Politically Correct language in the past few years. We, in the mental health field, no longer say “committed suicide”, but instead “died by suicide.” The change is subtle, but not without meaning. Continue reading “Died by Suicide”
Shopping for the holidays puts many people under additional stress: from spending money they don’t have, to long wish lists from kids or family members, to the time it takes to fulfill these desires-turned-demands.
My first suggestion is to trim your gift-giving list. In our family, we went from buying presents for 15 people to just the kids, which was initially 4, and grew to be 6, but is still much more reasonable. Also, my husband and I don’t exchange gifts as we take a trip for our anniversary the next month, and his birthday is right around Christmas, so he gets a birthday gift, which is usually an experience (comedy club, weekend trip, performing arts event).
To trim things even further, use The Rule of 4. Continue reading “Minimizing Holiday Stress”
“I can’t. I don’t know how.” What more paralyzing words are there? This is how children think. Adults know that the information exists, if you only know how to find it. Continue reading “You CAN:Steps for Successful Progress”